The Henshaws Are A'Coming
by Susan M. M
Summary: Chapter 4 of the Mrs. Standish AU:  Ezra was the guest of honor at a shotgun wedding in "French Cooking and Fibs."  Now his in-laws have come to call, and they're out for blood.
1. What Gram Henshaw Said

**The Henshaws Are A-Coming.**

**Standard Fanfic Disclaimer** that wouldn't last ten seconds in a court of law: These aren't my characters. (Excepting for the Henshaws, of course.) I'm just borrowing them for um, er, typing practice. Yeah, that's it, typing practice. They will be returned to their original owners unharmed, or at least suitably bandaged. This is the fourth chapter in the Mrs. Standish AU, originally published in the fanzine Let's Ride #8. You might want to ride chapters one through three first. It's Mary Sue, it's AU, and it's part of a continuing series. If you don't care for AUs, Mary Sues, or multi-part stories, you might want to read something else.

_**The Henshaws are A-Coming**_

by Susan M. M.

_Magnificent Seven_, Old West: Mrs. Standish AU

"Hey, Deputy."

Startled, JD Dunne looked up from the dime novel he was reading. He looked barely old enough to shave, so it wasn't surprising a stranger thought the brown-haired young man was the deputy instead of the sheriff.

"Looking for a card cheat name of Stanton or Stanley, something like that," continued the stranger. He was a big, beefy man with sandy-blond hair. Next to him stood another stranger, like enough in visage to be his brother, but with light brown hair. Both were dressed like cowboys; both were armed.

"You mean Ezra Standish? He don't cheat at cards," JD protested.

"Ezra Standish," repeated the second man. "That him?"

The first one nodded. "Where'd we find this louse?"

"Likely at the saloon." It occurred to JD – somewhat belatedly – that Ezra might not want these men to find him. "You might try the Lazy Hawk, north end of town." That wasn't quite a lie, since he simply suggested they try the Lazy Hawk, and hadn't said that Ezra would be there. He knew perfectly well that Ezra would be at his own saloon, the Queen of Diamonds.

"Much obliged, Deputy." The two turned to leave.

JD had the sense to wait until the door was closing behind them before he called out, "It's not deputy, it's sheriff."

**oOo oOo oOo**

Marina Standish stepped out of the butcher's shop. She hoped Ezra would like the pork chops she had bought for tonight's dinner. She glanced up and saw five men ride past. She shrunk back into the doorway, praying they wouldn't see her.

As soon as they were past, she ran south, heading for Ezra. She had to warn him.

**oOo oOo oOo**

"Ezra!"

Startled, the gambler looked up. His jade-green eyes blazed at his wife. "I thought I told you never to come in here."

"The Henshaws are here. They must be looking for me – looking for us."

Ezra frowned. His memories of his in-laws were unpleasant. He had no desire to renew the acquaintanceship.

"They're armed to the teeth. They're going to kill you, Ezra," Marina said.

"Better men than they have tried." Nonetheless, Ezra went behind the bar and put on the holster with the Colts he kept there for emergencies.

"I'm not going back with them," she insisted.

"I should be so lucky," he muttered. Louder, he replied, "Of course not. Don't worry, I wouldn't send my worst enemy back to the Henshaws."

"There are five of them, Mr. Standish."

"And three of us," Chris said. He looked over at Buck, who nodded. Ezra might have been a rapscallion, but he was their rapscallion. They wouldn't let him face his enemies alone.

"Go over to the church. Josiah will take care of you," Ezra told her. "Wait there. You'll be safe."

"But–"

"Go, I said. Out the back door," Ezra ordered her.

"Yes, Mr. Standish," she submitted reluctantly.

"Don't worry, Mrs. Standish. We'll take care of him," Buck promised her.

Unconvinced, she nodded. "Don't you dare get yourself killed."

"I assure you, madam, it is _not_ in my plans." Ezra watched as she scurried through the back door, making sure she obeyed.

"She's worried for you, Ez," Buck pointed out.

He did not reply.

JD rushed into the saloon. "Ezra, there's strangers in town looking for you."

"I know. My in-laws," the dark-haired cardsharp said. Still, he was pleased to see the young sheriff. Four against five was much better odds.

A few minutes later, the five Henshaws arrived. All looked mean, and ready for trouble.

"We're looking for Ezra Standish," Daniel Henshaw announced. He was a big man. His sandy-blond hair hadn't been near a barber's chair recently.

"You've found him," he replied. His tone was unfriendly.

"Is that him, Daniel? Is he the skunk that seduced our sister?" asked a younger man with brown hair.

"Step-sister," Ezra corrected. "And I didn't seduce her."

"That's him, Zeph." Daniel spit on the floor. "Step outside, Standish. We got unfinished business."

"I have nothing to discuss with you."

The Henshaws laughed. Zephaniah, Rina's step-brother, put his hand on his gun butt. "We ain't planning to talk."

"Not grammatically, at any rate," the gambler muttered under his breath.

"Maybe you ought to reconsider." Larabee stepped forward. He brushed his duster open to reveal his gun. Buck rose, too, and did likewise.

"Sheriff Dunne, as a businessman I reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. In-laws or not, these… persons are not welcome in my establishment. Be so kind as to invite them to leave."

"You can't do that to us," Jonas Henshaw protested. And as a Henshaw, he was used to getting his own way.

Daniel looked from Chris to Buck. He ignored JD, who looked more like a boy playing cowboys and Indians than the town's sheriff. "Why you sticking up for him? He ain't nothing but a card cheat."

"I do not cheat at cards," Ezra contradicted him.

Larabee hid a smile. It would be more accurate to say that Ezra did not cheat at cards any more. However, the gunslinger didn't spare the gambler as much as an amused glance. He wasn't about to take his eyes off the Henshaws for even a second. "Why you gunning for him?"

"This rat seduced and stole away our sister," Frank accused, piping up for the first time.

"We came to fetch her back and make him pay for what he did," Daniel said.

"Thanks to your precipitous actions of the previous month, the lady is now under my protection. And she is not desirous of returning to Franklin County with you."

The Henshaws just stared at him.

"Ezra means she don't wanna go," Buck translated. "And if she don't wanna go, y'all ain't gonna make her."

"She's gotta come back," Zeph said, as if stating a law of nature. "Gram said so."

"Your grandmother might own half of Franklin County, but she has no say here," Ezra informed them coldly. "I couldn't care less what she wants."

Frank inhaled sharply. He had never heard anyone speak that way of Gram.

"Step outside, Standish, and we'll settle this matter," Daniel ordered.

"No."

"What did you say?" Daniel couldn't believe his ears. No one ever refused a Henshaw's orders, especially when there were five Henshaws there, all of them armed.

"Get the hell out of my saloon. In fact, Mrs. Standish and I would prefer it if you got the hell out of town. And do not come back," Ezra continued.

"We come to rescue our sister and 'venge her honor," Zeph declared. "We're gonna fetch her back home. If'n you don't wanna step outside, we can take care of you right here."

"Make up your mind. First you forced me to marry the girl because you thought I insulted her honor, now you want to shoot me to avenge her honor?" Ezra rested his right hand on his Colt.

Larabee stepped forward. "Couple ways we could handle this, boys. You could walk away, and no one gets hurt. Sheriff Dunne could escort you out, like Ezra asked, and again, nobody gets hurt. Or you can do something stupid."

Bill Henshaw, playing silent rear-guard by the entrance, looked over the batwing doors. He nodded to his brother and cousins. All five reached for their guns.

Larabee's pistol fired before any of the Henshaws had managed to clear their holsters. The bullet passed through Daniel's sleeve, missing his left wrist by a quarter of an inch.

"They always choose stupid," Buck muttered. He shot only a second after Chris, his bullet grazing Frank's side.

"First shot's a friendly warning. Next warning's not so friendly." Larabee didn't mention that he had been aiming for Daniel's arm, hoping to wing him, and was as surprised as Henshaw was to get nothing but cloth. It wouldn't hurt if they thought he was a better shot than he was. In the mean time, Ezra and JD had drawn their guns.

"Drop 'em, boys," Buck ordered. "So far nobody's hurt bad. Put down your guns and nobody else needs to get hurt."

The Henshaws did not comply.

"Your kinfolk, Ezra. You want 'em dead or just chased out?" Larabee asked the man.

"So long as they leave my establishment, I have no preference whether they walk out under their own power, are escorted to jail by Sheriff Dunne for disturbing the peace, or are carried out feet first." The gambler aimed his Colt at Daniel's head. "Well, I have a slight preference in his case."

Fear shone in Zeph's eyes, fear and confusion. "Carl said he weren't nothing but a cardsharp, that no'un would care if we killed him."

"Carl was wrong," Larabee informed Rina's stepbrother.

"Gram said kill him and fetch Rina back. What're you waitin' for?" Daniel growled at his kinsmen. He fired. After a second's hesitation, his brother and cousins did likewise.

Ezra fired once, then ducked behind the bar. Smoke and noise filled the saloon.

The gambler winced as the mirror behind the bar was hit; mirrors were expensive.

A moment later all five Henshaws were on the floor.

"Everyone all right?" Larabee asked the others.

"Think so," JD replied shakily.

Ezra rose carefully from behind the bar. "What about them?"

Buck approached Zeph cautiously. Rina's stepbrother was trying to struggle to his feet. "Stay down, boy."

Zeph moaned and tried to sit up.

"Stay down," Buck repeated, "or you're gonna have a serious case of dead." He kicked the gun away from the young man.

Larabee went to Daniel, who had a bullet in his shoulder. "You'll live."

Ezra got some rope from behind the bar. Tying the knots just a smidgen more tightly than necessary, he helped Larabee disarm and tie up his in-laws.

"You'd best fetch Nathan," Larabee told the young sheriff. "If he hurries, they'll all live."

"That's a good thing?" Ezra asked him.


	2. What Ezra Standish Said

Marina Standish came running in, Josiah a few steps behind her. "Ezra! Ezra, are you all right?" Before he could stop her, she was clinging to him, embracing him.

"I'm fine." He gently pushed her away. "Madam, are you familiar with those stitchery things that girls sew? The things with mottoes and pictures to show off their stitches?"

"A sampler? Of course, sir." Inwardly, Marina shuddered. When Ezra used a cold, formal "madam" instead of her name or the warmer, softer "ma'am," she knew he was vexed with her. "I made them myself as a child."

"Be so kind as to oblige me by sewing one that says "love, honor, and _obey_." When I give an order, I expect it to be obeyed."

"Yes, Mr. Standish."

"I told you to stay with Josiah. You could've been killed, rushing into the saloon like that. Or they could have taken you hostage."

Marina's hazel eyes lit up. He did care, at least a little.

"Nathan will be here in a moment. Go to the back, boil some water, and find something to use for bandages."

"Yes, Mr. Standish." She went out of her way in order to kick Daniel on her way to the kitchen.

"What's she doing here?" Ezra demanded of Josiah Sanchez. "I trusted you to keep her safe."

"Don't be silly, Ezra," Buck retorted. "You never trusted anyone in your life."

Josiah traded an amused glance with Chris. "You've been married long enough to know how stubborn your wife is. Can't make her do something she doesn't want to do, or keep her from doing something she wants to do."

Buck sidled up to Ezra and said quietly, "Careful, someone will think you care what happens to your wife. You don't love her, remember?"

Ezra whispered back, "My feelings for her – or lack thereof – have nothing to do with the matter. The woman bears my name. I have a certain responsibility to her."

Buck nodded but managed to keep a straight face.

Nathan stopped at the saloon doors, peeking in to see if it was safe. When he saw it was, he came in. "Everyone all right?" the ex-slave asked them.

"Everyone on our side," Buck replied. "They weren't so lucky."

"Just sent JD to fetch you," Larabee said. "Where is he?"

"Don't know. I heard the shots and hurried over. What happened?"

Marina Standish came in, a pile of bar towels over her arm, a coffeepot in her hand. "My idiot relations came to harass Mr. Standish."

"We came to rescue you," Zeph protested.

"Rescue me? From the best husband any woman ever had? Arranging my marriage to Ezra was the only good thing Daniel and Carl ever did for me," she retorted.

"You mean you _want_ to be married to this rat?" Frank asked her, openly confused.

"Better him than Carl," she retorted.

"What you mean? Carl's got hisself a wife," Frank protested.

"You remember when Ruth was born? Doc Chandler put Peggy on bed-rest for the last few months of her confinement, and he still nearly lost her during the birthing. He warned her against having another one, said it'd be too dangerous. But Carl can't keep his britches on, so here she is, pregnant again. Once Peggy knew she caught, I knew I had to run, and then Daniel and Carl handed me an opportunity on a silver platter," Rina said.

As she spoke, Nathan bandaged.

"What the hell you talking about, girl?" Daniel demanded.

"Do you know how much the Circle H pays in wages every year? How much we spend on hay and oats? Do you know what percentage of the ranch's earnings Gram budgets for your drunken rampages before she pulls the reins short so you don't beggar the ranch? Or did you think it was all a whim, when she let you sow your wild oats and when she ordered you to behave yourself?"

Her stepbrothers and cousins just stared at her.

"_I_ know all that. Gram doesn't want to lose that knowledge. She's been planning to marry me off to Carl since Peggy nearly died, to make sure you idiots wouldn't run the ranch into bankruptcy after she died."

JD walked back into the saloon. "I couldn't find– Oh, there you are, Nathan."

"I'm here," the healer agreed, but he didn't look up from his patient.

"I would've married Old Nick to escape the Circle H. And then instead of Old Nick, you gave me Ezra. Gram must be furious at the two of you, but me, I'm eternally grateful." Marina didn't quite sneer, but she came close.

"Those three aren't too bad," Nathan interrupted. "This one and this one, we should get to my place right away."

"Josiah, would you mind assisting Nathan in transporting these miscreants? I'll join you there presently. I need to have a word in private with my wife."

**oOo oOo oOo**

Ezra didn't say a word until they reached their home. Then he slammed the door. "You used me."

"Yes, sir," she admitted meekly. She hadn't seen him this upset since she had lied to him about consummating their marriage.

"I ought to beat you senseless."

Marina did not reply. She went to the cabinet where he stored the brandy, poured him a cup, and handed to him without a word.

He took it and downed half at one gulp. "Well, no excuses, no explanations?"

"Trying to resist a beating just means more blows, and harder," she said sullenly.

Her tone disturbed him as he realized she was speaking from memory. "I ought to beat you senseless," he repeated, a little more calmly. "I won't, but I should."

"I married you for two reasons," Marina told him, regaining her composure as she realized he wasn't going to hit her. "To save an innocent man from being killed, and to escape the Henshaws. You've known that since that first day. Why should it matter whether I was trying to escape all the Henshaws or matrimony to Carl in particular?"

Ezra sipped the brandy. Logically, it ought not make a difference to him. But it did. He repeated, not quite as angrily, "You used me."

"We used each other. I escaped the Henshaws and you escaped a bullet. I admit I got more out of the deal than you did," Rina conceded. "But then, you were buying a pig in a poke, and I wasn't."

He raised a dark eyebrow.

"I knew you were a gentleman." He didn't respond, so she continued. "You helped me up when I fell. Daniel or Zeph would've just laughed at me, and Carl would've cussed me out as a clumsy fool."

"So on the basis of a little consideration you decided I should be your husband?"

"Not just that. I knew you were smart and after living with the Henshaws, I was tired of dumb."

"How could you possibly have ascertained my intelligence based on our brief acquaintance?" he demanded.

"Jake said you were a cardsharp. A professional gambler can't afford to be stupid, or he won't survive. And you were too well-dressed not to be successful."

Green eyes glared at her. "I want a divorce."

"The judge won't grant you one, and I have no grounds to ask for one," Marina replied calmly. "Everyday when I look at you, I think – I know – that I'm the luckiest woman in the Territory. I have a husband who's handsome and well-spoken, a prosperous businessman, strong enough to protect me from my enemies."

"All you wanted was protection from the Henshaws," he accused her.

"Carl _would_ have shot you," Rina reminded him. "But if I'd been forced to marry him, I probably would've shot myself, so you saved my life as much as I saved yours. I know I'm not as pretty as Mary Travis, or as well educated as you are. And I'm not as elegant or sophisticated as the ladies in San Francisco or New Orleans. I'd do anything to make you happy." She dropped the coaxing tone and stated resolutely, "Anything except give you a divorce."

"Madam, you could out-stubborn three mules."

"Gram Henshaw was a good teacher," Marina retorted.

Ezra refilled his brandy glass. He said nothing for a moment, nor did she. "Speaking of Henshaws, what do you recommend we do with your relations? It appears likely that most of them will live."

"Pity."

"For once, madam, we are in complete agreement." Ezra sipped his brandy.

"As much as I would love to see them rot in jail, if you had them arrested and tried, the others would simply come after them. It might be safer to send them home with their tails between their legs," she suggested.

Ezra nodded; he had suspected as much.

**oOo oOo oOo**

Ezra entered Nathan's makeshift clinic without knocking. "Are they going to live?"

"Should," Nathan said. "Dug the bullets out. If the wounds don't get too infected, they'll be all right."

Nathan had had to cut Bill's pants off to get to the wound. Ezra picked up the bloodstained trousers and picked Bill's pockets. He rifled through his wallet and removed the money. The gambler turned to face Daniel. "Where's your wallet?"

"A see-ducer and a thief," Daniel spit the accusation out at him. Nonetheless, Chris and Josiah's presence made him cooperative. "In my boot."

Daniel pulled his boots off. With obvious repugnance, Ezra removed the money. He counted it swiftly and then combined it with Bill's money. He laid half down on the table. "That is for Mr. Jackson's services. The Good Book says the laborer is worthy of his hire. The rest is to replace my mirror." Looking at Nathan, he asked, "Are they fit to travel?"

"Will be in a day or two," the healer allowed.

Ezra turned to face his in-laws. "Listen very carefully, because I'm only going to say this once. And I shall attempt to limit myself to words of one or two syllables, to facilitate your comprehension."

Josiah tried to hide a smile.

"Once you and your relations are fit to travel, I want you gone – out of this town, out of this county. It is my sincerest wish – one which my wife echoes, I might add – to never have the displeasure of seeing your faces again. Until you're fit to travel, Sheriff Dunne can keep you in the jail for disturbing the peace. Once you and your kinfolk can leave town without bleeding all over the road, I shall drop the charges. In return, I expect you to stay away. You will leave me alone. You will leave Mrs. Standish alone. Is that clear?"

Daniel just stared at him, his eyes filled with hate.

"In the saloon, this hombre said 'Gram said kill him and fetch Rina back.' That makes it attempted murder and attempted kidnapping," Larabee pointed out. "That's a matter for Judge Travis."

"As much as the thought of them languishing in the territorial prison fills me with delight, Mrs. Standish is concerned that the rest of the accursed clan may come to rescue them and harass us if they do not return to Franklin County. She recommended – how did she phrase it? – oh, yes, I believe her exact words were to 'send them home with their tails between their legs.'"

"Rina wouldn't say nothin' like that," Bill protested. "Rina wouldn't say boo to a goose."

Ezra raised an eyebrow at Bill's assessment of Marina's character.

Josiah chuckled. "For kinfolk, they don't know her very well, do they?"

"They're her step-father's nephews, hardly a close relation. A little less than kin, and far less than kind, to paraphrase the Bard. If I may have your full attention, _gentlemen_," he sneered the obviously inaccurate word, "this is what's going to happen. I shall file formal charges with Sheriff Dunne for disturbing the peace and vandalism. This will give him a valid and legal excuse to keep the lot of you in our local hoosegow until you're able to leave town. Once you're fit to travel, I shall drop those charges upon your word never to return. Then, when you reach the county line, I will file charges for attempted murder and abduction. If you ever return here, a warrant will be waiting for your arrest. As you've seen, I have friends here. A local jury will not be kind to the men who shot up the best saloon in town."

"Go to hell," Daniel Henshaw replied.

"You ain't going anywhere for a while," Nathan told him. "You got time to think over Ezra's offer. It's the best deal you're likely to get."

"Judge Travis, he's not known as a forgiving man," Larabee told them.

"And he likes Mrs. Standish," Josiah added. The judge had spoken to him privately when Marina had first come to town, asking him to keep an eye on her and to inform him if Ezra mistreated or neglected her. "His daughter-in-law's real friendly with Mrs. Standish."

Bill Henshaw moaned in pain. Daniel merely swore.

"I trust you'll be able to cope with these miscreants?" Ezra asked them.

Larabee nodded.

"They ain't strong enough to give us any trouble," Josiah assured him.

"Then if you will excuse me, I should be getting back to the saloon. Thank you for your assistance, gentleman. Never doubt for a second that Mrs. Standish and I do not appreciate your efforts on her behalf." He touched his hat as he headed out the door and then added as an afterthought, "Next time you drop by the saloon, the drinks are on me."

"Did Ezra just say thank you?" Nathan asked them.

Larabee lifted an eyebrow. "And offer to buy us drinks?"

"The judge was right." Both the gunslinger and the healer turned to look at the ex-preacher. "He said marriage to a good woman would be the making of that man."

The End

(The End of this story - there's more of Ezra and Rina's marital misadventures a-coming.)


End file.
